Okay so I officially went on my first date since Jack*. Yay! I’m so proud of myself for getting out there! I wish I could say things went off with a bang, but unfortunately, the BANG happened before I even arrived…

So in the weeks leading up to the date I have been casually swiping. Not a regular practice like before… more when I’m bored. However, lately, I’ve matched and messaged with a few really cute guys.

I had a date planned on Friday night with one of these guys. I actually talked to this guy briefly the few weeks before I started officially dating Jack. Back then, he asked me directly “Am I ready for a relationship?” (In general not with him as we had not met.) I told him all about Jack and that he was the one I wanted a relationship with, so this guy backed off. (Hey I knew what I wanted!)

This was one of the first guys to message me when I got back on the dating sites this round. Unfortunately, I had to cancel our date as my kid was sick on Thursday and most of Friday. We are supposed to reschedule. *fingers crossed*

I also had a date scheduled for Saturday night with another guy. This night my daughter was feeling much better so I was in.

This guy I matched on Bumble and his name is Dale*. He is a good looking single dad that lived close by. He was consistent at messaging and remembered things we texted from one day to another. Seems pretty easy but most guys don’t read the previous conversations or choose not to.

I dropped my daughter off, got all dolled up, and did a Facebook live. Most of my readers are my friends and family on Facebook and have been on this journey with me. I needed some support before I left so I reached out.

Rewatching my video I can’t help but laugh! I made good points but man you can tell I was BEYOND nervous! I actually said nervous 20 times. I quoted my favorite quote from my current favorite author as it has become my mantra..

I finished my video filled with love and support and leave for my date. Still nervous and digging through the butterflies for courage.

I leave early since the roads are really icy. I can feel my car sliding and my orange slip and slide light keeps coming on. Then I slowly approach a hill in my neighborhood.

A few seconds after cresting the hill my tires give out and my orange light is blaring in my face.

I start to pick up speed as I put my foot off and on my break.

I honk my horn repeatedly as there is a cross street and two cars heading my way. I slid through the street and pass the stopped cars.

My car hits a smallish ditch and a small wooden pole. It’s very loud and the neighbors run out of their houses.

I get out of the car and apologize repeatedly. I’m fighting the urge not to cry and can’t think clearly. Then a really good looking man comes out his truck and makes sure I’m okay. I tell him I am and then he begins jokingly teasing me about not wearing my coat. “It’s 28 degrees” he says.

I can tell he is actually concerned about me but my adrenaline is so high I can’t feel the cold. I also don’t remember I have my at winter coat on the passenger seat.

Then an older man from one of the houses helps me get out of the front yard. As he’s telling me directions the cute guy slowly walks away and gets into his truck and drives away. Ugh I am horrible at in person flirting! Plus I wasn’t feeling at my best… Obviously.

I slowly drive the way of the restaurant. Not because I want to still go on the date but it’s the only way to go home and not go up the dreaded hill. I had no idea what to do at that point. I’ve never had an accident where I had to handle the logistics. My brother in law and sister were busy and couldn’t be interrupted so I felt really alone and just a little adulting dumb.

I kept driving and called my date to cancel. I told him I had no idea what to do and that I would need to figure it out. We talked for a minute and I agreed to continue on with the date.

I show up to the restaurant right on time. (I told you I left early) Dale is waiting at the hostess station and I can see his back. He turns around and smiles. He is really good looking and his pictures didn’t do him justice. I’m excited!

We then sit down and begin to talk. He’s friendly, can talk about the Browns (major points) and we have a lot in common. However, there were points in the conversation when I realized that he just isn’t the one for me.

A small example was when “No Scrubs” came on the radio in the restaurant. The waiter began to sing and I did too. I didn’t go full out karaoke style but was having fun with it inclusive of a little shoulder shake.

I said “look he knows the words too” at the waiter.

Dale said “yeah everyone does” Then makes this whatever face.

A little about me, I love to sing and dance and really don’t care if someone is watching. If it’s a fun atmosphere then I’ll have go for it. A funeral? Not so much. So it’s a major turnoff when someone legitimately makes a mean face. A small eye roll I enjoy and singing along? 😍😍😍

There were a few other things that came up where I was like yeah no thanks. He will be a great guy for someone else but not me. I paid for myself and we left. Since then, we have had a few texts and I wished him the best of luck!

So what do I do now? Answer: Search everywhere for a hottie in a blue truck… Just kidding!

I’m going to continue to get myself out there. While I did mention Jack a few times on the date it is getting easier and easier not to think about him.

I wanted to leave you with a text that my friend sent me after the accident… I literally laughed out loud when I read it. It sums up this round of dating perfectly!

I’m looking forward to sharing more adventures soon!